Dating Parent

Are You Unknowingly Dating a Married Man?

2006-07-14T19:25:00.000-07:00

A married man from Long Island, NY recently made headlines when he was arrested for impersonating a U.S. marshal to get dates. Married for 17 years with 2 teenaged children, this man used an internet chat room called Long Island Over 40, to lure at least 11 women into relationships under the pretense of being a single man. One woman even became pregnant with his child. Had he not been impersonating a U.S. marshall, his dating duplicity might have never been exposed.

Dating Deception is Common

Unfortunately, dating deception is all too common. Married men frequently masquerade as single men. Although there are websites specifically for married men who want to cheat, many cheating husbands troll chat rooms and online dating sites in search of single women on whom to prey. It’s not just over the Internet; this dating deception occurs in offline locations as well. A surprising number of the men you meet at clubs, bars, parties and in other social settings, are married -- not single, as they claim to be. If you’re a single woman looking for a committed relationship, the last thing you want is to find out is that you’re dating a married man who’s cheating on his wife.

Signs You’re Dating a Married Man

With so much deception going on, single women need all the help they can when it comes to identifying a married man who wants to play games. The 6 telltale signs below are taken from a tip sheet I complied entitled “15 Signs You Might Be Dating a Married Man.” It provides guidelines on how to tell the fake bachelors from the genuinely single men.

• He only gives you his cell phone number so you can’t contact him at home.
• He calls you at odd times – in the early morning or in the wee hours of the night.
• He’s unavailable on weekends, holidays, or other times when his family might be around.
• He’s overly secretive about his family and friends.
• He refuses to give you his home address or tell you exactly where he lives.
• When he opens his wallet to pay the check, you catch sight of a family portrait with wife and kids.

By identifying and avoiding married men the dating pool, you can avoid unnecessary headaches and heartaches. For a FREE copy of the tip sheet with all 15 signs, send an e-mail to InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com with “married man-ez” in the subject line.

About Ruth Houston:

Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the founder of InfidelityAdvice.com and the author of “Is He Cheating on You?-829 Telltale Signs” which lists practically every known sign of infidelity. For more information about the book, cheating men or signs of infidelity, or for a list of FREE infidelity tip sheets available, visit http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Ruth_Houston

Turning a Date into a Mate Part I: How to Find a Date and Keep the Conversation

2006-07-12T17:47:00.000-07:00

Relationship...for some that word stirs up fears of commitment and for others it conjures up the idea of ever lasting love. For many on the dating scene 'ever lasting love' is their ultimate goal but how do you find someone to go on a date with and once you do how do you go from date to relationship?

While the person you're dating may be looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right, they may not be looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right now, meaning pull in the reins and go a little slower. But let's start at the beginning instead of jumping straight to the finish line. Let's get back to the basics.

To get back to basics, let's start with a history lesson. Dating can be a scene right out of your High School memory banks. Many are haunted by memories of their first date and the nervous tension that resulted from the anticipation of it: "Did I pick the correct outfit?" "Will I smell good to them?" "Is my breath okay?" "What will I say during those awkward moments of silence?"

Things haven't changed that much since High School. Often the same questions come to mind and you will still get that same sense of nervous anticipation before embarking on a first date with someone.

Dating can be a very intimidating time to even the most experienced and savvy dater. Recently I asked both men and women who dated frequently (3-4 times a week on average) if they still got first date jitters. The same answer echoed through 93% and that was a resounding, "Yes!"

Amazingly enough, even those people who seemed confident and poised; those who seemed to have an endless amount of dating potential as well as a line of prospective suitors, still got first date jitters. So for those singles that still have troubling memories of their past dating experiences, how do you jump into the dating pool and begin to swim again?

Unlike swimming in a pool filled with water, don't dive into the deep end of the dating pool first even if you remember how to swim. There may be sharks lurking waiting to attack. It's always best if you start in the shallow end of the pool first. Start out small by meeting people in groups at functions until you feel comfortable enough to seek out a dating partner. After that hurdle is crossed then by all means dive right in to the dating pool!

Where can you find a dating pool in your area? Because many people have a select group of friends, they tend to see the same people at all of the functions, B-B-Q's, parties and other events. Same faces with the same stories that become all too familiar. So where do you meet compatible and available singles? Here are a few suggestions:

1. Find charity events in your area and attend them. 2. Look in your local paper for events that singles would go to. Social functions, chess café's, ice cream socials, etc. 3. Find sporting clubs (the kind of clubs that actually have participation such as water or snow skiing trips.) 4. Take a specialty courses at a junior college or community center. 5. Go to your local coffee café and sit on the comfortable chairs that are in the round to make conversation more likely. 6. Your local grocery store can be a buffet of single people. There are specific times and ways to approach people that I talk about that in my book, but don't have the space here. Use your best judgment. 7. Check out reputable online dating services (be careful, more later).

If you're nervous, as most of us are, prepare for your first encounter just as you would when vying for a promotion at work. Practice ahead of time! Make up a little 3x5 flash card set with subjects you are comfortable talking about or questions that are conversation initiators (forget about the weather, that's a dried up subject).

Here are a few you can use that are sure to spark some interest:

1. Read or watch the news ahead of time and discuss current events. Stick to positive uplifting ones and stay away from politics and religion. Example: Recently in the news there was a story about an autistic boy whose lifetime dream was to play basketball. To be close to the sport he did all the dirty jobs for both the boys and girls teams at his school. The last game of the season he was allowed on the court and scored a slam dunk. 2. Talk about your family (positively). Example: I have two brothers and one sister. Growing up we... 3. Liven up the conversation with topics of any recent travels. Example: Recently I traveled to Washington State to see the Fish Market in Seattle. Talk about your experiences there and what you saw. 4. Ask about their career and how they happened upon it. Example: What do you do for a living? What made you decide on that career path? Did you go to school for your career choice? 5. Ask about their family (if they shy away, you need to also). Example: Do you have brothers or sisters? Does your family live close?

These are just a few topics. If you can't think of any yourself pour over the Internet for resources on topics of conversation. While I gave you a few suggestions above, there are many more I am sure you can come up with. Because online dating has become the norm for meeting people I want to outline a few tips for using online dating services.

When you join an online dating service you have much the same feeling of anticipation and excitement as you do when you are about to go on a blind date. The prospect of having people approve of you and possibly accept you as someone they want to have around them is exhilarating.

But how do you create a powerful and compelling online dating profile? You've heard that honesty is the best policy...It is. Be honest. The person you're trying to attract will eventually agree to meet you if you have written an eye catching profile. Eventually the "real" you will pop out. You don't want to get dumped once your feelings are involved.

Statistics show that people can only keep up a façade of pretending to be something other than they are for approximately 3-6 months (there have been cases of years but that's not the norm). If you want to find Mr. / Mrs. Right, adhere to the honesty policy and represent yourself exactly as you are and not want you want others to perceive you.

Be clever and funny in your profile but be sincere. (Think of the online dating profile as if you were actually speaking to them in person for the first time.) If you're funny, then show it in your writing. Don't tell someone how funny you are, e.g. "I'm funny and have a great sense of humor." That won't make them a believer.

Here is an example of something funny and clever. Football fans will enjoy this one. (This is not for your profile but used as an example of funny lines I have used when talking to an audience.):

"If your partner is more concerned about that 3rd and 1 on television, than the 4th and 23 in your own living room, then you might be another statistic on the playing field of love. Tell them to not try for a 58 yard field goal, go for six instead."

Do you see what I'm writing about? Word pictures are very powerful tools that help draw the reader in and help to reveal who you are and what you're about.

Another important aspect of your online dating profile is pictures. Show them a picture of you. A picture speaks volumes about who you are. If you say you are sporty but have a picture of you sitting on a couch, what does that say? Use a picture of you on a bike, in a race, waterskiing, etc. Don't use a High School picture if you are in your 20's or older. Use a recent picture. They will find out what you look like when they meet you. Why draw someone in and then have them ditch you if you don't look the same?

The eyes reveal a lot in a picture. If they sparkle with what's called a "catch light," the viewer will be more drawn to you. (A catch light is the little light that shows up on the pupil). If your eyes look suave, the viewer will probably click you away.

Make sure to do a spelling and grammar check before you post to an online dating site. Words that are spelt incorrectly and bad punctuation can tune a lot of people out and then they will click you off.

A few last words of advice: Forget about negativity in your profile and don't talk about ex-relationships. That will give the reader a sense that you are a serial dater and perhaps a heartbreaker.

Avoid phrases like: "I don't play games."; "I love long walks on the beach, candlelight dinners, and romantic nights by the fire." You can show them that when you meet them.

Every person I have surveyed in the past has said that lines such as the above are red flags and a sign that he/she is a "player."

Online dating can be fun, exciting and successful, but be safe and enjoy the process. When you finally connect with someone on an online dating site, agree to meet at a coffee shop during the day. Never go off in their car no matter how safe they seem, always take yours.

About the Author

Jaci Rae's grit and determination brought her from a poor childhood to a successful singer and performer who tours around the world. She is an Barnes and Noble and Amazon #1 Best seller of Winning Points With The Woman In Your Life One Touchdown At A Time. http://www.jacirae.com or http://www.winningromance.com About.com Dating Guide said this http://dating.about.com/od/datingadvice/ss/RelateBooks_6.htm

How to Get the Date without Having to Chase the Guy

2006-07-11T13:20:00.000-07:00

The woman who pursues a man does so because she’s afraid to share control of the courtship with him. A quality man wants a woman who trusts her instincts enough to recognize him and to allow him to court her. Courting you is his share of the control, and responding is yours. A man of quality will enjoy courting a woman of quality.

You may find that if you chase after a man, you’ll chase him away. If you’re a successful career woman, or a parent who’s worked hard to provide for her children, you know what it means to accomplish your goals. You know what you want and you do what it takes to make it happen. In the realm of love and relationships, sometimes doing what it takes means doing nothing, because there’s now another person involved. Bonding with Mr. Right isn’t a straight-line progression from A to B to C. Instead, it’s a give-and-take, back-and-forth structure where you become closer, not just from the actions you take, but also because of what you don’t do (i.e., you don’t act on your fears, pursue him too aggressively, or violate his boundaries by trying to fix or control him).

Your taking control of the entire courtship can drive Mr. Right away, and it can bring Mr. Wrong closer to you. Your trying to control the courtship can mean that you can’t handle rejection well, and you’ll lose validation as a result. Controlling the pace is different than controlling everything about the courtship. In controlling the pace, you set boundaries and observe your emotions, so you don’t race ahead of yourself. Controlling the entire courtship means you call him at those times when it would be more appropriate for him to call you. Controlling the courtship and not sharing that control means you’re trying to play both your role and his at the same time, and that will free (and motivate) him to pursue someone else.

Give him a chance to court you. Self-reliant women are used to taking action and getting results, but such an approach can backfire when it comes to love. For instance, getting a college degree is within your control. You research schools, apply for admission and perhaps financial aid. You show up for class, study hard and repeat the process until you graduate. When it comes to dating, half the control belongs to your suitor. You can control only your part of the courtship process – but remember, you control 100% of your part.

Traditional dating rituals, such as allowing the man to initiate the invitations, allow you to control the pace. Just because you allow him to court you, that doesn’t mean you give up any power or control in the process. On the contrary, the first empowering act of control you exhibit is that of allowing him to court you. If you feel compelled to pursue him, ask yourself why. Current culture dictates that women are on equal footing when it comes to calling; but to make it work, you’ve got to be calling for the right reasons.

If you call a man because you’re unwilling to allow him to court you, it could be that you feel unworthy of his attention. You may also believe that he may not want to see you unless you do all the work. Or you may feel some vague uneasiness at having to wait for his invitation, which is a sign that you’re on the brink of using this man for a level of emotional fulfillment that you should be providing for yourself.

Another cause of vague uneasiness would be that you’re feeling and fighting the urge to rush the relationship instead of enjoying each moment as it comes. If you feel uneasy at having to wait for him to contact you, question why.

Are you really just concerned that if he doesn’t call, you won’t have any alternate plans? Be sure you have enough activities and interests to keep you occupied so you don’t reach out to a potential Mr. Right to fill any emotional neediness you’re experiencing. If you want to call him because you’re used to being in charge and in control of your life, then remind yourself that you are in control when you give him the opportunity to call you. If you like this man enough to be excited at the idea of dating him, then you’ll have to trust him enough to court you.

Dating Expert and Speaker Marcia Augustine is the author of Emotional Wavelengths: How to Tune In Marriage to Mr. Right. Set for a Fall 2006 release, you can order your copy now from her website at a special prepublication discounted price.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Marcia_Augustine

Single Parents - Finding Dates Made Easy

2006-07-10T20:37:00.000-07:00

Being a single parent, finding a date can seem like a difficult feat, if not impossible, but it does not have to be that way. As the number of single parents continues to grow, communities are finding more practical ways for local single parents to find dates. The following paragraphs will briefly discuss some dating options available, in order to make finding a date easier for single parents everywhere.

One option to make finding dates easier for single parents is the single parent can place a personal ad seeking dates in several different local paper publications. It usually is not very costly to place a personal ad in the newspaper, and it is sometimes free for female singles seeking dates. As with anything that seems good, there are disadvantages that come with placing a personal ad. Sometimes people will lie when placing personal ads, and they may not really be the type of person they portray themselves to be in the personal ad, and perhaps they may be someone a single parent would rather not have around their children. It is, also, always very important to remember this when dating someone who may respond to your personal ad. When meeting someone who answers your personal ad, you should always agree to meet in a public place. It is never a good idea to invite a stranger to pick you up at your home.

There is another option single parents have to help them find dates is online dating services available on the world wide web. There are many online dating services available in most areas, and in most instances, there is little or no membership fee for female date seekers to place an online ad, or to submit her profile for public view ( at www.21onlinedating.com it's for free ). Online dating allows the single parent to view photographs of people, and view their profiles, before deciding to correspond. As with placing a personal ad in the newspaper, online date has it's disadvantages, as well. Dating prospects can easily lie to their in their ads and profiles, so it is a good idea to always beware. Just like with placing a personal ad in the newspaper, the single parent should get to know a person in public before inviting them back to their home, or expose them to their children. Meeting in a well lit, public place is always the best decision, especially for the first few dates.

Lastly, finding singles groups to find suitable companionship is a great way for single parents to find dates easier. Single parents can find lists of these groups in the newspaper, or even listed at community centers, churches, and even some libraries and schools. These lists will often includes groups like "Single Parent Cooking Group" and "Single Parent Dance Class". These groups are specifically for single parents to intermingle, and sometimes these activities even encourage participation from the children.

http://www.21onlinedating.com

Living Single And Loving It

2006-07-10T20:35:00.000-07:00

Each day we are bombarded by ads and tips for navigating the world of online dating. If we didn't know better we might believe that in order to be complete in our life we have to have a mate. Well if that were true, what about all the folks out there living single and apparently loving it?

In 1970 only 7.8% of Americans aged 30-34 had never married. By 2003 that number had risen to 27.9%. The reasons are many, the rise in the divorce rate, the feminist movement and the intolerance by many singles to be married just for the sake of having a partner. Add to that the fact that as people live longer there is a greater chance they will be living that way as a widow or widower.

The plus side is that it is easier than ever to be living single. Though it once may have been the norm to have a two parent household with the rise in the divorce rate many parents are doing the job alone or sharing it with their ex-spouse. Having a child as single woman or adopting as a single parent have found an acceptance today that they might not have enjoyed twenty or so years ago.

Despite what you may have been led to believe single people are living full and happy lives and are not necessarily looking to change their single status. That is not to say they shun relationships, but instead they feel free to not settle for anything less than Mr. or Ms. Right. If the perfect person comes along it is a blessing but if it never happens they certainly don't feel as though they have been cursed.

Single woman today do not depend on a partner for financial security. She has her own investments, buys her own home and has a family if she should desire. In fact single women are the second largest group of home buyers nationally. Clearly a man does not define who she is for she is perfectly capable of defining herself. As for the single men out there, a woman does not equal a complete life. They are able to create that for themselves.

Many singles feel that marriage is a full time job and for now they have other goals they want to achieve. They have career and education goals that take priority and if a relationship does not interfere with these goals that is fine, but evidently a relationship may be a little lower on the list of priorities.

Let's not discount the population of single adults left in the wake of rising divorce rates. Living single has allowed the opportunity to reconnect with them self, after being in an unsuccessful relationship. Living single can help to define what the appealing parts of a relationship are and what they would not tolerate again.

Whereas it is true that for some people singleness is thrust upon them through the death of a spouse or a partner, for a growing number of others it is a conscious choice. Though many admit it was not their first choice they have come to accept life on life's terms and pursue nothing less than a full and happy life.

Researchers may have found that married people are happier than single people and even live longer. Many traditionalists may feel that singles are making a mistake by shunning the accepted view of how men and women should conduct their lives, meaning together, for the benefit of society. Despite these beliefs it appears that the marriage rate is slowing down and today's singles are finding that the traditional married role will not necessarily guarantee happiness.

Living single today includes carving out a life that is uniquely your own. By the looks of it, whether they remain single in the short term or for the long haul, single men and women are finding ways to love it.

About the Author

Maureen Staiano is a Life Coach specializing in working with women and the unique and challenging transitions we face in our lives. Please visit Maureen at: http://www.achieveyourdreamcoaching.com/

Dating Advice for Single Moms

2006-07-10T20:33:00.000-07:00

If you are a single mom and you are dating or you are thinking of entering the dating scene then you should know that this period can be very confusing for both you and your kids. The new change to single parent dating is going to require a lot of adjustment and compromise. For all those young single mothers, single working mothers and even the single moms that stay at home, we have a few single parent dating tips made especially for the single mothers dating and single moms seeking dating.

Single parent dating should be slow and at your pace! Make sure that you are ready. Successful single parent dating depends on you. Don't be pressured by others to get back into the dating scene, wait till you feel comfortable and you feel ready.

Try not to bring different men to meet your children. As much as we all understand that single moms out there are will be meeting different men everyday, your children do not need to meet each and every one of them. Leave the introductions to the special few!

We know that life as a single parent can be difficult and you are always looking for a helping hand, but your new dating partner does not need to be that helping hand. Single moms; avoid the temptation to make your new dating guy a parenting helper straight away. Don't have him take on parenting roles too soon into the relationship. This could cause tension with the kids as well as scare him away as he might not be ready for that responsibility. Remember single parent dating is a slow and steady process!

Always have your priorities in order. As a single mom you know how important it is for you to be at your son's soccer match or your daughter's piano recital, these are your parental priorities. Avoid putting them second to your dating life. You might get caught up in the excitement of single parent dating but remember the children come first and your new guy must be able to handle this decision.

When you do finally go for that long awaited date, enjoy yourself! For most first timers in the single parent dating scene they may often experience feelings of guilt and act out these guilty feelings by talking about their children during the date! Don't sabotage the relationship before it has even started. He is having dinner with you not with all your single parent dating problems so try to keep the kids talk short and sweet! http://www.singleparentlove.com

About the Author

Kay Mubaiwa works for http://www.cupidmedia.com a company that runs succesful online dating sites including http://www.singleparentlove.com, a dating and personals servce for single parents looking for love.

Playdates And Blind Dates For Single Mom

2006-07-04T21:00:00.000-07:00

Interesting post at the Post: On Balance - Juggling Work and Family by Leslie Morgan Steiner, guest blogger has a bunch to say about jumping back into dating.

In hindsight, I feel lucky to be free of him. But I wasn't exactly prepared to be the 28-year-old single working mom of our seven-month-old baby. As a researcher at Time Inc., then a freelance editor and writer in New York City, I'd managed to support myself for a decade. Now, I had to turn to family and friends for help. I moved back to California for more support.
At first, the thought of dating again was unthinkable. It was tricky enough balancing hours of peek-a-boo and dirty diapers with editing and deadlines. Besides, trying to get over my ex had shut out the possibility of romance. Not to mention how exhausted I was.
When I hit 30, however, everything changed. I stopped nursing. I was ready to get out of domestic overdrive. This is how my Match.com profile began:
"Are you an honest, big-hearted man with no addictions, except coffee?"

Read the full article here

Christian Dating

2006-06-27T14:02:00.000-07:00

There are many people who consider Christianity a crucial pre requisite for a lifetime partnership with another person.

As there is considerable demand for Christian minded people to find a partner, there has been an increase in the number of Christian dating sites that have emerged on the Internet.

There are generally strict guidelines before people can become members of Christian dating sites and for this reason the sites tend to have a lower membership count than many of the general dating sites. The upside of this however is the fact that the clientele is more targeted so you can be assured that you will only be looking in a market where you are sure that the people online will have the background that you are interested in.

There are free and paid Christian dating sites with the free sites earning their income from the advertising that is displayed on the site.

These sites allow you to post a picture of yourself and your profile giving other members the chance to see what your interests are.

When a suitable candidate is found the members can make contact with one another and determine if they would like to interact further after corresponding online.

This offers a safe environment and also makes it a lot easier for those people who are too shy to make contact with others in offline dating situations, such as parties, clubs and so on.

Many Christian dating sites also arrange events where people can meet one another in a safe environment, such as dances, dinners and in some instances holidays or weekend travel.

Christian dating sites cater for all age groups and personal situations, from young singles to elders and those who have lost their partners through bereavement or divorce.

If Christianity is an important aspect of your lifestyle then Christian dating sites might be just what you are looking for.

About the Author

Graeme Ramsey is a freelance writer on many different topics. Christian Dating

Dating Trips

2006-06-23T21:05:00.000-07:00

Taking a trip? Why not hookup along the way?

Trips are fantastic places to pick-up and now many dating sites are trying to cash in on the action. Read more: These trips are for singles hoping to become doubles - Los Angeles Times

Access to the Internet as well as a growing population of singles has fueled the boom in such travel. About 43% of adult Californians are unmarried, according to Unmarried America, a singles information service (www.unmarriedamerica.org) that extrapolated this figure from 2004 U.S. Census Bureau figures.

Post 40, Post Divorce, Horny British Woman Now A Famous Author

2006-06-19T19:06:00.000-07:00

Check this great article about Suzanne Portnoy, a divorced, middle-aged horny woman with a "stable of studs and an otherwise typical mother-next-door existence. Post 40, post divorce, looking for sex - Style - Times Online

I turned 44 last year, and I can honestly say that I’m the most content I’ve ever been. Because, unlike most single mums I know of my age, I’ve found a way to combine adult fun with raising a family. Every other Friday night, I drop off my two boys with their father, then drop in on a playmate. I have a rota of four or five men I see, mainly for sex.

I’m not prepared to sit around waiting for Mr Right to come along. I learnt early on that when I see someone I like — whether young buck or mature man — I make sure they know it. Men move fast; why can’t a woman?
[. . .]Then I discovered the internet, and everything changed. I posted a personal ad on an American website, specifying that I was looking for a pen pal, not a relationship. I wanted to talk to a man about my day-to-day life and emotions, something I was doing less and less with my husband. The next day, there were five messages in my inbox. I was
as excited as I’d been when I received my first Jackson Five fan-club newsletter at the age of 10.
Thus began a correspondence with a New York lawyer who, like me, was married with two children. What started out as consolation and harmless fun quickly became a full-blown love affair. Three months after beginning our correspondence, and two stone lighter (with sex on the agenda, I found the incentive to lose weight), I found myself hailing a taxi at Kennedy airport, heading for the W Hotel on Times Square. In the course of our 18-month long-distance affair, we met up often, working our way through the spectrum of perversions, including exhibitionism, group sex and fetish clubs, and watching hours of porn for inspiration.

FOXNews.com Online Dating Series

2006-06-18T07:22:00.000-07:00

Here is the link to FoxNews.com's last part of the three part series on online dating they've been running: FOXNews.com - Online Dating: Is True Love Just a Click Away? - Celebrity Gossip | Entertainment News | Arts And Entertainment

If you haven't been reading it, check it out. Its worth a few laughs at least.

Urban Mamas

2006-06-14T11:12:00.000-07:00

Portland area readers should check Urban Mamas for help with kids at urbanMamas: Mamas Seeking Other Mamas

They have a great site that seems very user friendly and applicable for single parents.

We receive many questions regarding finding out more information about play dates and meeting other mamas, especially from those new to the area.

You also need to check out the hot mamas page, these girls have got it going on all the way:

Do you consider yourself a "hot" mom? Well then, maybe you should consider joining the HotMomsClub - looking to redefine motherhood. No, does this not sound like you? Would you like to become one? Well, just your luck, these hot mamas have written a handbook about empowerment and releasing your inner siren so that you too can feel confident enough to sport one of their lovely, overly-priced tees. And, there might just be enough time to order a "My Wife's a Hot Mom" tee for Father's Day! What's truly ironic is the description in the About Us section mentioning that, "A Hot Mom can be eighteen or ninety-eight, a size two or a size twenty two, have one child or fifteen!" Yet, when you click through the site you only see celebs and "beautiful" people. I think I'll just settle for being an urbanMama.

Widowers More Likely To Remarry?

2006-06-12T12:13:00.000-07:00

The Columbus Dispatch - Life / Arts has an article that suggests widowers are more likely to take a second leap at marriage. The article holds up Paul McCartney as the poster boy, but I need more empirical evidence than that.

The article also quotes a couple of love experts who seem to think men want to repeat the success of a marriage.

Sociologists have been studying the phenomenon for decades and conclude that it goes beyond demographics. It boils down to differences between the sexes: While both men and women want companionship and security, many women might be more cautious about taking a new man into their lives and tend to hold out for romance.
Men, on the other hand, typically seek someone to organize their world, the everyday household tasks and their social lives and to keep them company.

Impersonals.com

2006-06-08T18:37:00.000-07:00

I know, you're beautiful on the inside - The Impersonals

You've got to love the catch phrase on the homepage of impersonals.com

We couldn't find a personals site we weren't embarrassed to join, so we made our own.

Impersonals.com is the latest personals site with a couple of twist. The site boasts

Bookmarking and matching: Add profiles to a list to ~~spy~~ ~~stalk~~ watch someone else, if they bookmark you too, you're notified with a cute "match symbol"
Daily message limits of 3 new people a day - good idea, keeps some date spammers away
No horoscopes: big plus, keep this stuff outta there
RSS feeds for profiles: a little too technical, can't quite figure out why or how you would need this

Playboy Dating Reality Show

2006-06-02T20:42:00.000-07:00

You've got to love this Playboy channel rolling out racy new 'Foursome' reality dating show - Reality TV World - News, information, episode summaries, message boards, chat and games for unscripted television programs

The only problem is this needs to be on something that doesn't cost me more money!

Playboy TV will roll out the half-hour show July 8. It will take two couples each week and follow them for 24 hours to see if they end up in the sack, Daily Variety reported.
Every move will be recorded -- including bedroom moves.

Sounds like this could get ugly.

The Widow Matchmaker Lawsuit

2006-05-31T10:36:00.000-07:00

A widow has won 2 million in a suit against a Beverly Hills matchmaker who promised to introduce her to only men who wanted monogamous and earned more than 1 million a year and had estates of more than 20 million.

Great that she got the 2 million, but seriously, girl, did you think that man existed on this planet?

What Real Free Dating is All About

2006-05-26T08:07:00.000-07:00

If you have ever tried to meet new people and find potential dates online you surely have encountered 'free dating'. What exactly does free dating mean, you may ask.

Almost all dating sites in the Internet offer free dating services but is it really for free? Usually, these online dating sites let you post your profile along with thousands of other individuals. You can also interact with other individuals in the site through emails, instant messages and forums.

However, most of the additional features of these dating sites comes at a cost. If you wish to avail of these features you will be asked to upgrade your account or pay for a subscription. That doesn't sound like free dating to me.

Real free dating gives you freedom.

Free dating lets you get in touch with exciting and interesting potential romantic partners and friends without the hassles of paying a fee just to search a database of profiles. Free dating lets you take advantage of the latest technologies that the Internet offers. After all, online dating is meant to be quicker, easier and better than traditional methods of finding a date such as going to bars, meeting someone in a cafe or at work, perhaps.

Real free dating lets you find your match quicker

We all know how hard it is to meet someone special who shares the same interests and outlook we have. Unless you are some gigolo or bombshell, finding a date - a special date - can be very frustrating. However, with free dating, it is easier and quicker to find your match. There are innovative alternatives to traditional online dating sites - those hat let you find a potential romantic partner or friend without having to sift through hundreds of profiles looking for that special date.

Imagine a dating site that directly links you to a community of singles looking for romance online. You wouldn't have to pay membership fees every month just to keep using this service to meet new people.

If you know the feeling when you're just about to find that special someone, then read on. Free dating - one that gives you freedom to find potential romantic dates without worrying about monthly fees and other hassles - is now a reality.

Free dating brings a whole new level to the online dating world with its exciting and hottest technologies on the net. Now, you can use the fast and popular sites to find that interesting, exciting romantic date and enjoy a easy way to meet a romantic partner as well as new friends. Enhance your social life when you connect with people of the same interests.

You can instantly communicate with your new friends and connect with a huge singles community. What's more, dating sites offers total security, privacy, safety and give your romantic and social life a new spark.

DatingShare is 100% free dating site and matchmaking service for singles. Plus provides free dating forum with dating tips and advices.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=George_Wood

Great Expectations Dating Service Lawsuit

2006-05-25T13:34:00.000-07:00

Expectations Clash in Dating Service Lawsuits: Financial News - Yahoo! Finance tells the story of a couple of would be dating service lovers who were screwed, not by online dating site losers, but by an old fashioned dating business.

Each says the old-fashioned, non-Internet dating service suckered them into paying thousands of dollars, and then refused a refund when they realized they'd been looking for love in the wrong place.

Technorati Tags: dating services

Dating For The Stinkin' Rich

2006-05-25T06:58:00.000-07:00

Check this for info about Millionaire Match.com, which is trying to help the wealthy find love Where the well-to-do can go for mates

Give me a freakin break. This is the saddest attempt I've ever seen by overly wealthy people to try to make themselves feel normal, but not too normal. Know what I mean?

This is another example of the overly wealthy trying to stay within their ranks. Please people. Let's hope the site is infiltrated with low-lifes like most other datings sites.

Technorati Tags: online dating

12 Dating Traps and Solutions

2006-05-23T12:43:00.000-07:00

In my work as a Marriage and Family Therapist most of my practice has been working with couples, because after experiencing divorce growing up as a child, and again after a ten year first marriage, I decided that my mission is to help people have successful marriages and families, and I thought the best way to do that would be as a marriage counselor. However, what I discovered over the years is that people generally make appointments with me when it's almost too late; they're on the verge of divorce or it might be a last resort, after there's been a lot of irreversible damage done.

How relationships work and how to have a successful Life Partnership have always been fascinating mysteries to me. One thing's for certain; times have changed and what used to work doesn't work anymore. The biggest change in the past 30 years impacting relationships that I can see is that we have developed a need to be "happy". This is a dramatic shift from our parents and grandparents who were quite satisfied surviving and achieving some measure of comfort and security. The need for happiness sounds very simple and innocent, but it's the primary reason for failed relationships today, and the high divorce rate, single parent families, mental and physical health problems, juvenile delinquency, welfare, and so on.

While we seek to be happy in relationships, we don't seem to know how. As a result I have seen many people make relationship choices and fall into traps that prevented them from getting what they want in their life, resulting in unhappiness and relationship failure. A trap is basically an unsolvable problem that results in unhappiness in a relationship. Getting out of the trap often means leaving the relationship.

When you're single you can do a lot more than you realize to avoid these traps and prepare for a successful and lasting relationship, as you'll see in this article.

1. Marketing Trap

Believing you need to make yourself more appealing to attract a partner and "selling" yourself with attractive packaging and presentation. High risk of disappointment and relationship failure as people discover that the excitement and promise of the "sizzle" conflicts with the reality of the "steak".

Solution: Authenticity. You will attract compatible people when you show them who you really are. At the risk of mixing metaphors, "Birds of a feather flock together", so don't try to look like a prize-winning chicken when you are your own breed of duck!

2. Scarcity Trap

Believing there is a limited supply of possible partners, so you have to take what you can get or be alone. Results in relationship failure when you settle for less and compromise your Requirements. A self-fulfilling prophecy when you get less because you expect less.

Solution: Define your first choice of what you really want and persevere. Trust that if you apply yourself you can get what you really want in your life. You must be able to say "No" to what you DON'T want, to be available to say "Yes" to what you DO want. You have the power to choose who, what , where, when, and how, and can get what you really want if you make effective choices aligned with your Vision and Requirements.

3. Compatibility Trap

Assuming that if you have fun together and get along well, you are compatible and a committed relationship will work. Results in relationship failure when discovering the vast difference between a fun-focused, recreational " dating" relationship, and a serious long-term committed relationship. Being so different, the process and criteria for choosing a recreational relationship needs to be very different from choosing a Life Partner.

Solution: When you are ready for a Life Partnership, define your Requirements and use them to scout, sort, and screen potential partners. Do not try to convert a recreational relationshipinto a committed one, unless 100% of your Requirements are met.

4. Fairytale Trap

Passively expecting your ideal partner to magically appear and live happily ever after without effort on your part. Believing that finding your soul mate will just "happen". Results in disappointment when the frogs that happen to jump into your life don't become princes.

Solution: Take personal responsibility for your relationship choices and outcomes. Have effective scouting, sorting, and screening strategies. Initiate contact and be the "Chooser", don't simply react to people that choose you.

5. Date-To-Mate Trap

Becoming an "instant couple" as if giving each person you date an extended test drive. Believing that if you develop an exclusive relationship with someone you are dating, a successful committed relationship will eventually happen. Other terms for this are "Serial Monogamy" and the "Mini-Marriage.. This approach is a costly use of time and emotional energy. The inertia in this trap is pressure to make the relationship work, attempt to solve unsolvable problems, and fit the round peg in the square hole because breaking up and being single again is an undesired outcome.

Solution: Date a variety of people and have fun without being exclusive. When you are ready for a committed relationship define your Requirements and use them as tools to scout, sort, and screen potential partners. Make a careful relationship choice and consciously use a "pre-commitment" period to determine if this is the right relationship for you.

6. Attraction Trap

Making relationship choices based on feelings of attraction. Interpreting a strong attraction to someone as a sign that the relationship is a good choice and "meant to be". This approach results in relationship failure when unsolvable problems surface because you ignored the red flags while infatuated. Unconscious choices usually result in repeating unproductive past patterns.

Solution: Balance your attractions by defining your Requirements and use them to scout, sort, and screen potential partners. "Choose your life's mate carefully. From this one decision will come ninety percent of your happiness or misery.(H. Jackson Brown, Jr. from "Life's Little Instruction Book").

7. Love Trap

Interpreting infatuation, attraction, need, good sex, and/or attachment as Love. "If it feels good, it must be Love." "Love is all you need." "Love conquers all." Results in relationship failure when you discover that love is not enough to meet your requirements and needs.

Solution: Make conscious relationship choices by defining your Requirements and use them to scout, sort, and screen potential partners.

8. Rescue Trap

Hoping a relationship will solve your emotional and financial difficulties and bring you happiness and fulfillment, something like winning the lottery. You avoid taking responsibility for your life challenges, expecting to be rescued from them. Results in desperation, neediness, and relationship failure when problems multiply instead of disappear.

Solution: Define your Vision for your life and relationship and "Live your Vision" as a successful single person. Resolve emotional, financial, and other problems prior to seeking a lasting committed relationship. Seek to be in a position of "choice" and "want" rather than "need".

9. Co-Dependent Trap

Expecting someone to love you and give you what you want by giving them what they want. Attempting to earn love and happiness by acquiescing, giving and helping. Needing to be needed often results in unconsciously attracting and choosing a relationship with a person that needs you, but you later discover is unable to give you what you want.

Solution: Define your Vision and Requirements and choose a closely aligned partner. Learn to be assertive, identify and ask for what you want and need, identify and assert boundaries, and develop the ability to say "No". Be the "Chooser" and cautious of people that choose you!

10. Entitlement Trap

Believing you deserve to be happy and get what you want in your life without effort or changes on your part. Results in relationship failure as you rely on your partner to bring happiness and fulfillment and inevitably experience disappointment. "If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always got."

Solution: Take personal responsibility for your life and relationship. Define your Vision and Life Purpose and live them when single.

11. Virtual Reality Trap

Believing that "what you see is what you get." Making hasty long-term relationship decisions based on short-term impressions and inferences instead of actual experience and knowledge. Results in seeing what you want to see and relationship failure when later reality doesn't match.

Solution: Assume "you don't know what you don't know" and stay in a "pre-commitment" stage until you have solid experience and knowledge that this is the right relationship for you.

12. Lone Ranger Trap

Believing that you don't need anyone's help in finding your Life Partner. You evaluate people you meet for their relationship potential and do not take the opportunity to cultivate new friends. Results in isolation, perception of scarcity of potential partners, and risk of settling for less than what you really want because you don't want to be alone.

Solution: Develop a support network/community of friends of both genders and be supportable by enrolling them to scout for you.

David Steele, MA, LMFT is founder of Relationship Coaching Institute and author of the ground-breaking new book for singles Conscious Dating: Finding the Love of Your Life in Today's World. http://www.consciousdating.com Visit http://www.ConsciousRelationshipResources.com for FREE live tele-seminars, recorded audio programs, podcasts, e-programs and newsletters for singles and couples packed with cutting-edge relationship information that will help you have the life and relationships you really want.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=David_Steele

Your Best Friend Just Got Divorced – Do's & Dont's

2006-05-22T08:42:00.000-07:00

Divorce is a painful and messy business. Divorce touches us all in some way. We maybe the product of divorce or we may know someone who has gone through a divorce. The scars that are left can be life altering to say the least.

One of the most difficult things to witness is your best friend going through a divorce. You can see the pain and suffering a friend of yours is going through. Perhaps your friend is very angry and bitter and that can put a strain on the relationship.

If your best friend is in the middle of a divorce or has recently gone through a divorce you must be patient and understanding in order to help them through this very difficult time.

If you are talking with your friend and you happen to say something that makes them angry or upset, just remember they are probably not angry or upset at you. They are most likely; angry at the situation they are in. If they say something that might be hurtful to you, let it pass and try to put yourself in their situation. Unfortunately, they are probably lashing out and you just happen to be there.

When a person is going through a divorce, they can handle the pressure and change in many different ways. For some people, they want to surround themselves with friends and family and discuss the situation openly. Other individuals, feel like a complete failure and what nothing to do with other people. Instead they prefer to be by themselves and think about the changes in their lives. Recognizing what your friend wants is an important step to helping them. Respect their boundaries and allow them to set the pace for discussion.

When my brother went through his divorce, he commented to me that he felt like a complete failure. At the time, I didn’t understand him. Having gone through my own divorce recently, I can now relate to how he was feeling. After my separation, I felt ashamed, guilty and like my brother, I felt as though I had failed miserably.

When you are speaking with your best friend after a divorce, just remember they are probably feeling like a failure themselves. At that moment, they do not need to hear what they are doing wrong or what they need to improve upon. What they need are friends that can listen and empathize with their situation. Be supportive and offer upbeat advice when the situation warrants.

If your best friend shows no interest in getting together like you use to do in the past don’t panic, they probably just need some time by themselves. What you should do is maintain contact and communication. Don’t push it though. Invite them out even if they continue to refuse. Show them you are interested by dropping a quick email or phone call just to see how they are doing. When you talk to them, try not to dwell on the divorce or separation but on other positive things that is happening in their lives.

Gary Kelly is co-creator of the online dating website for golfers, DateAGolfer.com and PuttingForPar.com, a golf website specializing in personalized ball markers

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Gary_Kelly

Teen Dating Horrors

2006-05-22T08:22:00.000-07:00

Dark Side Of Teen Dating, Survey: One-In-Eleven Teens Suffers Physical Abusive Relationship - CBS News has a disgusting report about the horros of teen dating.

I realize this blog is focusing on parents dating, but by the very idea that we are parents, this is something to be concerned with.

The article reports:

A recent survey from the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found that one-in-eleven high school students has been a victim of dating violence, such as hitting, slapping or other forms of physical abuse. Those teens are also much more likely to report binge drinking, suicide attempts, physical fighting and sexual activity.

China's Booming Online Dating Industry

2006-05-20T19:55:00.000-07:00

They've tried to keep the internet as clean as they can in China but check this:People's Daily Online -- China's online dating market to hit 81 mln US dollars in 2008

That's right, there is no free speech in China, but online dating is booming!

Baihe, which claims to be China's largest online dating site, received 11 million dollars of investment after attracting more than 5 million users in 2005.
But for those people to seek their true soulmates, Baihe's CEO Tian Fanjiang said that those who want to get friends online must discard the ideas of "one-night stands" or "affairs" and try to build up a loyal atmosphere.

No kidding. Maybe once they figure that part out, they can tell me.

Online Cheating Makes Me Sick

2006-05-19T19:25:00.000-07:00

UHGGH! This makes me puke! Check Why is he still going to Match.com? | Ask MetaFilter for the horror story of the day: guys who won't give up looking even when they're in a realtionship!

Give me a break, if you're in the relationship, try it out (you freaking pig).

If this doesn't piss you off, what will:

My relationship with Mr. Right has become physical. We see one another a lot. When we're not together he calls me and we usually have pretty lengthy phone conversations. So if he was seeing anyone else it'd have to be that he was getting two hours of sleep a night or something ridiculous like that. Because of my bad experience with Mr. Wrong I didn't want to do anything stupid when I should have known better, so last night I went to Match and found Mr. Right's profile again and, as it was a few weeks ago the "Active within 24 hours" was noted. If you are a Match member other members can see who's looked at their profile, so I went in anonymously with a different browser. I don't think my profile is accessible to anyone at all because I deactivated it but I didn't want to take any chances that he'd think I was still trolling around on Match - I'm not.

When Kids Help You Pick Your Dates

2006-05-18T07:40:00.000-07:00

Check Blogging Baby for a cute story about your kids picking out your dates:Tom Cruise's daughter told him Katie was The One - Blogging Baby

Great for Tom, but this has never really worked for me. What kid wouldn't like Katie Holmes, though?

As blogging baby also says

Okay, let me try again. I suppose that for every parent who begins dating again after a divorce, there is a hope that the kids will like the people we like. I divorced five years ago, and if my kids had had serious issues with my second husband, then I would have had reservations about the relationship.

Been there, done that.

Technorati Tags: tom cruise, katie holmes, parent

Truth Behind Internet Dating Headlines

2006-05-16T09:32:00.000-07:00

Check here for a great list of the true meanings of internet dating headlines.

Some of my favorites:

PROPORTIONAL WOMAN SEEKS PRINCE CHARMING: Seeking Prince Charming is just her way of saying,"'Seeking someone who will take me to the All You Can Eat Buffet."
TIRED OF GAMES: Now that she's in group therapy with other scorned women, she's ready to get back in the saddle.
SMART, SUCCESFUL, HANDSOME:In these types of headlines, the guy usually forgets to add pathological liar.

Dating Games Parents Play

2006-05-15T20:26:00.000-07:00

From The Kentucky Standard Online comes an article about the fun of parent's dating games.

When two single parents take interest in one another more pieces come into play. The stakes are higher and time constraints can push the players to exhibiting the best or worst games of their lives within tight windows of opportunity.

Wise, good players usually won’t expose their most highly prized pieces (their children) to the other player too soon.

Of course, some parent daters put their own interests above those of their children, but those players inevitably lose in a far more important game - the game of life.

Children don’t need to be cast into parents’ dating games too soon, but they can take on a more passive role, even early in the game.

Honesty And Online Dating

2006-05-15T08:43:00.000-07:00

If you are planning on joining the millions of singles in the world of online dating then the one thing you need to know is that you need to be honest with yourself and with those you will be matched up with.

If you are truly looking for a lasting relationship then you owe it to yourself and others to be honest about who you are and what you are looking for. You need to treat your online dating experience the same as if you met someone for a regular date. On a regular date you are face to face, talking, sharing stories, reading body language and that makes it easy to read the other person, just as they are reading you. And if you are not honest on a regular date sooner or later your date will start to see through you and your chances of a another date are little to none.

Now in the online dating world you will not get that face to face contact. All you and the person you have been matched with will be able to go off of is your personal profile and the emails that you have started to exchange. You can say alot with written words, but the problem is that it's hard to judge character, emotion or intent from written words.

When you fill out your profile about who you are, what you do and what you want out of life you can say anything you want and no one will be the wiser. And you may run into others who have embellished their profiles as well. The question you have to ask when you are doing your profile is how would you feel if you met someone through an online dating service and when you finally meet how would you feel if everything they said about themselves was not necessarily true. Think about it, you've just spent allot of time and energy trying to get to know this person and when you finally meet face to face and start talking you start to find out that they are not the same person you just spent a month or two exchanging emails with.

It's in your best interest to be completely upfront and honest in your profile and when you start exchanging emails, because if you aren't, the moment they find out you will be right back at square one again. And if they report you to the dating service you could loose your membership as well.

Any long term relationship is built on trust, and if you can't be honest from the get go your chances of finding that type of relationship are not very good. Remember, you want someone to fall for the person you are, not the person you think they want you to be.

About the Author

Andrew Bicknell is a writer and the owner of http://www.romancinghearts.com.

Are The Irish The Loneliest People?

2006-05-15T08:32:00.000-07:00

Check CNN.com - Google: Irish the Web's loneliest users - May 15, 2006 for info Irish users of the internet search engine being some of the loneliest internet users.

Google Trends, which works out how many searches have been done via the Internet search engine on particular terms, showed the word "lonely" was entered most frequently by Internet users in Ireland.

Apparently the Irish divorce rate has been creeping up steadily. Check the Flirtbox for Irish dating possibilities or this list of other Irish dating sites to end the loneliness.

Dating For The Single Parent

2006-05-14T07:55:00.000-07:00

Are you single again? Getting back into the dating scene after being away from it for a while can be tough. Tougher yet if you have kids involved. A few years ago some friends of our's went through a divorce. Over time Kelly started to express her loneliness and how she was considering getting back into the dating scene. But, her concerns were always the same "Where do I start" or "How can I find a good man when I've got two kids in tow?" Yep, it's harder to date when you have kids. With working all day, taking the kids to one event or the other. Spending the weekends with homework, housecleaning and grocery shopping, where's the time? Plus, what about the cost, babysitters, dinners out, the whole idea can be quite overwhelming. That's when I suggested "Online Dating".

As outlined in my book "the Ultimate Online Dating Handbook" It's easy to do, and doesn't cost an arm and a leg. As a matter of fact you can get started meeting new people for No Cost at all. And here's the best thing. Once you've got the kiddies all tucked away in dream land you can head for your computer and have some Mommy (or Daddy) time. From the comfort of your own home you can get to know people. Pour yourself a glass of your favorite white wine, put on some soft music, and chat up a storm. You'll find many, many new dating prospects without even leaving the house. Once you create your personal ad, and start responding to other ads your social life will be enhanced almost overnight! So guess what? She decided to give it a try. And, after chatting for just a short period of time she decided there were a couple of gentlemen who seemed "worthy" of her time and money. As she would have to pay the neighborhood babysitter for the evening.

All through her online experience she was careful to play it safe and keep her anonymity guarded. But, what about now? What happens now? Well, you still want to protect your anonymity. You must remember that giving out your personal information to someone you still don't really know not only gives them access to you, but to your children as well. And, of course as parents we all want to be protective of our kids. So, Don't Give It Out! Not until you've met this person a few times offline, and you feel comfortable with him. There is no point giving someone all your personal information and after the first face to face met you feel this person is not for you. And yes, this does happen. Sometimes those we met face to face may not be quite the same as when we conversed online and therefore you may decide he is not for you. Simply arrange for a place and time to meet and take your own transportation there and back home. Never let your date pick you up at home, and always tell someone where you are going, who you are with and when they should expect you home. Listen to your intuition! Your gut feeling is always right, and you'll know when the time is right to give out more personal information. Also, an other great tool is doing a background check. This will tell you of any criminal or marriage records.

If you do find someone special enough to spend time with. Someone who can love your children too - Yes, you are part of a package deal remember. You and your kids. Start slowly having your children spend time with the two of you together. Any action you take is going to affect their lives as well. So they'll need to be happy with your new friend also. You'll need to be up front with them, on a level they can understand for their age group. Just listen to your heart, you'll know when it's the right time to introduce your friend to your kids.

Don't spend time with anyone who can't love your children too. As I said earlier you are part of a package deal. For any long-term relationship or even marriage it's you and your kids.

Good Luck!
Marie Clare
Relationship Consultant & Author

About the Author

Join our Free Dating Service and meet Millions of Singles seeking Love and Romance Online. Search by Location, Age, Interests and Lifestyle. Start Dating Today! http://www.lifematesnow.com/dating.htm For Free Tips, Hot Articles and Advice on Dating, Romance, Relationships, and Sexuality visit us at http://www.lifematesnow.com

Single Mothers and Dating

2006-05-14T07:54:00.000-07:00

There will be a time when the pain of divorce or breakup has lessened and being single again feels more normal. This is when you start to notice men again as potential partners. Your friends start trying to fix you up and you begin to consider going out to meet new people... of the opposite sex. Despite your early protests about never wanting another relationship, you are beginning to think about dating. While shared custody is becoming more acceptable, most divorced women still have full custody of their children. With traditional visitation, single women with children may have every other weekend available to date. Women who do not have a co parent have even less time to devote to dating. What do single mothers do about dating when they have children at home?

If possible, plan your dates and your single social life for when the children are with their father. For casual dating, or going out with friends, a schedule of every other weekend is a good one. It allows a good balance between responsibilities to the children and your new life as a single woman. It also builds in a structure to help a newly single woman slow down and take her time meeting just the right person to date.

When meeting potential dating partners, be up front about the fact that you are divorced (or single) and have children. There is no need to apologize or feel less desirable because you have children. Over 50% of marriages end in divorce, so there are a lot of single parents out there. You are looking for a relationship with somebody who will fully accept and appreciate your children, so you don't have to downplay the importance of being a mother. On the other hand, you don't want to monopolize the conversation talking about your kids when you first meet someone. This is your time to reconnect with yourself outside your role as wife and mother, so enjoy talking about other things in a social setting.

If you meet somebody you really like, and it looks as if the relationship is developing into something special, then is it time to introduce him to the kids. And this depends on the ages of the kids. Teenagers, of course, are more able to understand how relationships develop and also realize that some relationships work out and some don't. They can know you are dating somebody special fairly early in the dating process. Just let them know that you are just dating right now and do not know if the relationship will work out or not. Introduce your teenager briefly to your date and don't expect him or her to be particularly happy about it. Teenagers are dealing with their own sexuality and really don't want to think about yours. And please resist the temptation to use your teenager as a confidant. You are the parent, not their buddy, so don't share the details of your relationship with them.

With younger children, wait longer into the dating process. It's hard to pinpoint an exact time, but make sure the relationship is going well and looks like it's heading toward a commitment. As a first meeting,plan some kind of activity outside the home that includes the children and your new love interest. Gradually increase the time you and your new partner spend with the kids until they have had a chance to adjust. Hopefully, the relationship will work and your kids won't have to deal with another loss.

Give yourself a lot of time to observe your new man with the kids. Look for red flags. Remember, this person is on his best behavior with your kids, and if you see problems now, there will definitely be problems later. By all means, don't have casual dates spend the night at your home when your kids are there. If the relationship looks serious, be very discrete about your sexuality around your kids. If possible, leave the sleep-overs for when the kids are visiting their dad. As the relationship becomes more serious and you want to spend the weekends together with the kids there, be very aware of your privacy and don't put the kids in an awkward position. Remember, to young kids whoever is sleeping in the marital bed is pretty much a sure thing, so don't set them up for disappointment by rushing into a live-in relationship.

Dating when you have children is difficult, but not impossible. Use good judgment and be a responsible parent. The right man will appreciate that you value your role as a mother. If he doesn't, it's time to move on.

About the Author

Dr. Jennifer Sowle, PhD., is a Licensed Psychologist and Marriage and Family Therapist. She is also a certified Sex Educator and Counselor. Dr. Sowle's website, http://here-to-listen.com gives information on psychological problems such as depression, anxiety, PTSD, and eating disorders. She also provides help for Relationships, such as conflict resolution, family finances, communication techniques, divorce, parenting,and sexuality.

Online Dating Tips for Single Parents

2006-05-14T07:53:00.001-07:00

Are you single again? Getting back into the dating scene after being away from it for a while can be tough. Tougher yet if you have kids involved. There are a number of new challenges involved in dating with children. With working all day, taking the kids to one event or the other. Spending the weekends with homework, housecleaning and grocery shopping, where's the time? Plus, what about the cost, babysitters, dinners out, the whole idea can be quite overwhelming.

The first thing you need to do is the same as everyone else. Start by making a list of what you are looking for. Maybe at this point you are really only looking for someone to spend time with. Maybe go see a movie that doesn't have talking animals in it? Have dinner without a happy meal? We all need that adult time. Follow the same rules for creating your profile. But you need to include in your ad that you have children. Let people know if they are with you full time or part time. Many ads say "my children are number one" This is a great way to let people know how important family is to you. There will always be people scared off by the fact you have children, but you probably don't want to date them anyway. Believe it or not, there are people who would love to find a great person with children because they love family as much as you do. When browsing ads look for people who are interested in "family activities" or "enjoy family time".

When you do find someone special enough to spend time with, they should be someone who can love your children too. Remember, they are part of a package deal. You, and your kids together. You may want to start even more slowly online than someone who doesn't have kids. Your children and their safety are your first priority. Any action you take is going to affect their lives as well. So they'll need to be happy with your new friend also. You'll need to be up front with them, on a level they can understand for their age group. Just listen to your heart, you'll know when it's the right time to introduce your friend to your kids. Start slowly having your children spend time with the two of you together.

Don't spend time with anyone who can't love your children too. As I said earlier you are part of a package deal. You must remember that giving out your personal information to someone you still don't really know not only gives them access to you, but to your children as well. And, of course as parents we all want to be protective of our kids. So, don't give your personal information out until you've met this person a few times offline, and you feel comfortable with them. The first few times they are with you and your children watch for any signs that they may not actually like children, how do thy act?, how do they talk to your children?, do they make any inappropriate comments? Anything that doesn't sit well, any gut feeling, show them the door. Your children always come first.

For any long-term relationship or even marriage it's you and your kids. New challenges will come when trying to coordinate schedules and time together. Blending families can be a real challenge and not one to be taken lightly. Respect your children's feelings. If the other person has children also, it might be nice to have similar custody schedules so that your children and their children are together on the same weekends. That way you can plan family activities together and on your "off" weekends you can schedule time together for the two of you.

Remember, when dating someone with children, you need to accept them as part of the package. That package will probably include the ex and shared custody with them. You need to be flexible and accepting of their past and everything that goes with that. Dating again as a single parent can be exciting, overwhelming, frustrating and very rewarding.

About the Author

TJ Smith is a writer, publishers and the creative force behind several websites including Mega Date Cafe http://www.megadatecafe.com Online dating advice, tips and news.

Dating After A Divorce

2006-05-14T07:53:00.000-07:00

Divorce, no doubt is an intricate phase in one's life, several issues have to be resolved, vivid memories of the past have to be deleted, self-esteem and confidence have to be rejuvenated, and the deep laceration that divorce leaves behind have to be provided healing touch. You may feel exasperated dealing with divorce trepidations, and in such a scenario you definitely will not have the time as well as energies to devote to dating. Several questions will impinge your mind simultaneously such as, "Would someone really want me?" or "Would anyone find me attractive?" or "Will I ever learn to date again?"

During excruciating divorce proceedings you may feel lonely and desire the camaraderie of someone. You may also find someone, but he/she may only be lending a sympathetic shoulder for you to cry up on and may soon be fed up of your problems with ex-spouse, children, in-laws or daily trips to New York lawyers firm. Do not rush into a new relationship in haste because it will be built on a weak foundation and in no time it will crumble. Moreover, it is not good to initiate a new relationship while the trails of the past relationship have still not disappeared, that is you are still in the last stages of your official or final separation. Not only will it save you some explanation in the court, but it will also speed up the process and free you in no time.

Now that you are single and ready to mingle, you should first focus on whether dating is right for you or not. Do not let others compel you to rush or go slow, take your own decisions. The divorce tempest must have left you perplexed. Give yourself some time to revert back to a normal being. Do things that lift up your spirits and make you feel more confident. Work on improving your own self and self-esteem. Take good care of yourself. Join a gym to tone up your physique, eat healthy, and get a facial, streaks in your hair and a manicure. Give yourself a complete makeover, buy new accessories, clothes, etc. This will help you to triumph over the horrendous past.

Take time to think about your children. Be prepared for their medley of reactions about your new relationship. They may be supportive or they may simply not support your new relationship. They may sabotage your dating plans, whine when you're on the phone, misbehave when your date arrives, fail to give you messages, and otherwise throw a wrench into your best-laid plans. Do not forget that your children have gone through the same grieving process as you have. Remember your date can possibly never replace their other parent, so give them time, eventually you will find your children beside you.

Resist the temptation of someone who is totally different from your ex-spouse. Remember, that there were a lot of things about your ex-spouse that appealed you once up on a time. For heaven's sake do not indulge in any relationship just to wage revenge on your ex. Nobody relishes an emotional roller coaster ride. Your first relationship should be a healing experience. It should revitalize your feelings, and your emotions. It is the best time to rediscover yourself. It is not necessary that the first relationship should be a long one or last forever. Don't be bog down if a break up occurs because at least you got a chance to wet your feet.

About the Author

Anubha is studying computers and also works as a part time freelance writer. Her articles are regularly published at reputed websites. Read more articles written by Anubha at:

Dating Sizzlers and Bollywood Sizzlers

Dating Advice from a Single Parent

2006-05-14T07:52:00.000-07:00

Dating can be a wonderful and exciting time in ones' life. The newness, the possibilities, and the hope that this could be "the one" can create a euphoric feeling. The thoughts of you and that special someone conquering life and all its ups and downs as a team can be elating. Dating as a single parent entails all of these feelings and emotions but with one added caution. Everything you do affects not only you but your children as well.

When entering the dating scene as a single parent you must be ready to be honest and open about your situation. Honesty is always the best policy. There would be nothing more awkward than dating someone for a period of time and then casually mentioning you have a child. Your children are the biggest part of your life and should be expressed that way. Parenthood is part of who you are and only to be admired, not hidden.

When searching for that special someone there are additional qualities you should be looking for that other singles without children may not be. The most important thing is to be sure the other person likes kids and accepts them as part of your life. Lack of enthusiasm about children or an utter displeasure about anything involving children is a major red flag. Someone who incorporates your children into some of your dates and shows excitement to see them is a great sign.

Keep a checklist in your head of things you're looking for but don't overdue it. Don't constantly examine the date as if they will someday be a parent to your child. People without kids don't have the same knowledge about family life as those of us who do. Just remember to keep an open mind and give them a chance. It's a date not an interview.

Many single parents on the dating scene tend to feel some guilt. There's always the thought that you are being selfish by spending time away from your children, especially with a date. Everyone deserves to be happy, even a single parent. Just because you have children doesn't mean you are any less deserving of adult time and adult feelings.

Single parenthood is a tough job full of responsibilities and emotions. Starting over and trying to find a partner to share your life with can be a difficult experience. If you simply view it as a chance to meet people and enjoy some grown up time it will put less pressure on you and your date, leaving less room for disappointment. Most of all, remember to be honest and open minded. There are so many people out there who admire single parents, love kids, and would love to share time with you. Go out and enjoy yourself!

About the Author

Jillian Gates writes articles on dating and matchmaking for online dating sites. www.MatchmakingMoms.com, www.MatchmakingFriends.com,www.MatchmakingKids.com

Dating Advice for Single Parents

2006-05-14T07:43:00.000-07:00

If you're a single parent and trying to date it can be tough Thinking about dating and having the time to date sometimes seem as far apart as East is from West. Questions run through your mind...

Am I being selfish? Do I have the time? Who is going to watch the kids? It's been so long. Do I even know how to date?

It can seem overwhelming and look like a far away dream if you didn't have anyone to guide you. Lucky for you, we've picked the minds of successful single dating parents and put together an action plan that will make dating fun, safe and rewarding.

The Action Plan

Your action plan is made up of five simple steps. Each step is designed to build upon the previous one. The goal is for you to spend time with quality dates that respect you and your situation. You will put your plan on paper. Why? Writing takes your plans out of the world of thought and brings it into the world of reality. Get your paper and pencil and let's begin!

Step 1. Asses your situation.

Do you really have the time to date? As a single parent your activities revolve around your kids. Caring for a even a single child is a full time effort. If you have more than one child your workload multiplies. If you decide to date you'll need to create flexibility in your weekly plans and plan in advance. It takes time to find love. If you want love...make the time. Write down the time available each week that you think you can devote to dating. Schedule it.

Step 2. What do you want?

What type of relationship do you want? Are you looking for short term relationships? Long term? Committed? Non-committed? Do you have a time line? Biological ticking clock? What type of person do you want? Tall? Short? Loves to travel? Stay at home type? Christian? Family oriented? Good family relationships? Be honest with yourself. Consult your heart and your head and create the profile of the perfect person for you. Don't leave anything out. List the qualities you admire. The type of family you want them to come from. The color of their eyes etc. The more specific the better. Make it as detailed as possible. A crystal clear target is much easier to hit than an out of focus one. Cupid has the arrow. Help him out and provide the target. Again, write it down. Once your have a clear picture of what you're looking for it's time to find them.

Step 3. Find a date.

There are three places you will go to find a great date. The first and the easiest is a dating website. Yes there are thousands of websites out there. Some great. Some not so great. Read a review of the best dating websites and choose the ones that meet your criteria and join 2-3 of them. Why 2-3? To increase your chances of a match of course. Having your profile/ad in 2-3 dating website substantially increases the odds of a great match. Successful daters play the odds in their favor. Another advantage to dating websites is that you meet people 24 hours a day. Seven days a week. You can view their profiles and if you don't like what you see...delete them! Pick only the best.

The second place you'll go for dates are your family and friends. They know you and your life circumstances. They only wish the best for you. Let them know you're looking for a date and what you're looking for (pull the profile sheet out). Let them look for you. The odds are that you'll have a date within a week. Two weeks tops.

The third place to look for dates is anywhere that you happen to be. You never know where love hangs out. Be open to new experiences and new people.

Step 4. Separate prospects from suspects.

If you followed step three you'll be getting a number of potential dates. The task now is to separate the good(prospects) from the bad(suspects).

As a dating single parent your first job is to protect yourself and your child from anyone that would do anyone of you harm. Safety will be your first screen. If you know the persons full name check to see if this person is a sex offender. Your state may have a registry where you can check for free. Better safe than sorry.

If it's a dating website candidate spend time to get to know the person via e-mail first. The rule is give just general information (no phone numbers, last names, addresses etc) until you get to know the person over a period of time. Minimum two to three months. If they can't wait that long then move them to the suspect file and delete them.

If this is a blind date from your family and friends get ALL the information you can on the person. This would be a good time to write down some questions that you'd like to ask your potential date. Nothing like being prepared. Talk on the phone first. Ask questions to determine if there is some broad based compatibility. Do you like the same things? Dislike the same things? The closer you can match these the happier you'll be.

Once you've done your homework it's time to go on a date. WooHoo!

Step 5. Date!

The first rule is be yourself. The second rule is have fun. If you can follow those two rules you'll have a great time. To ensure that you have a safe and fun time follow these rules.

1)Always let someone know who you're going out with. Where you'll be going. What time to expect you home.

2)Bring your cell phone. If you don't have a cell phone. Get one. They're cheap. No reason not to have one.

3)Always meet in a public place for your first meeting.

4)Arrange a date dump call. Arrange for someone to call you mid way through your date. Prearrange a code word to let them know that your date is going well or not. This is your opportunity to dump your date if you're bored to tears.

5)Consider having your date somewhere you can talk. Like over dinner or maybe a lunch date. Avoid movies on the first date because it doesn't allow you the opportunity to get to know someone. At a movie you get to sit silently for two hours listening to the person behind crunch popcorn and slurp their five gallon bucket of soda. How fun is that!

Being a single parent doesn't mean shutting your heart down. Despite having your kid(s) fill every minute of your waking day you still have a longing in your heart for that special someone.

If not for love...maybe just for a good adult conversation over a warm cup of coffee. Good luck in your dating!

About the Author

James Lindsey is a writer and publisher that takes the mystery out of romance and dating. His work can be enjoyed at his website http://www.RomanceRebel.com. Or send a e mail request to newsletter@RomanceRebel.com and get heart smart relationship advice & tips delivered to you!